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Vulnerability

I walked into the classroom and she was sitting there on her phone; instantly I disliked her. Her perfectly straight dark hair cascading down her back. Perfectly manicured nails long enough to gouge someone’s eye out. As for her makeup, I don’t think there was an eyelash out of place. Why did she have to be in this class? I was doing simply fine until she came along.

I flop into my chair completely disgruntled that I would now have to deal with this perfectly put together woman whom I was certain everyone else was just going to love. Grudgingly I greet and introduce myself hoping that the teacher does not pair us; highly unlikely as there are only four of us in the room.

When I got home that night, I lay in bed wondering what it was about this woman that I had just l met that irritated me so much? I ran over the events in the class from the moment I walked in, analysing just about every thought in my head about her. There was simply no justification for how I felt. She was nice enough, had been practising Kinesiology for over a year and helped eagerly when I got stuck learning a new technique. And everybody else did indeed like her. She is even featured on the teacher’s website so must know her stuff! I fall asleep wondering what was it about me that just did not like her?

The following morning, I wake with the thought: She represents everything I think I should be like. I feel frumpy, she looks elegant; I feel tired, she looks totally energised. I feel old, she looks ten years younger despite us being the same age. It was not her after all, it was my thinking and once I understood that for myself; everything changed for us as friends.

We phone each other exactly when the other person just wants someone to talk to and vent whatever frustration is going on for them. We celebrate each other’s wins, because we understand that ultimately, we are all one. When I celebrate you; I am celebrating myself. When one of us is low the other one holds the space for her and supports her through her particularly trying time. We are simply just what good friends are meant to be.

Instead of instantly disliking her, I just instantly connected with her. Why? I have absolutely no idea. She just gets me and when I am at my worst, there is no judgement, only love and understanding.



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