I think I have just encountered another crisis in my life. I am struggling with my changing circumstances, having changed my life so dramatically back in 2007 when I went back to university so I could study engineering but I believe the term ignorance is bliss was the complete truth for me back then. I did not know any different and I most certainly did not hold any expectations of the outcome. I simply knew I was going back to school; I was going to study engineering which proved at times both spectacularly frustrating see sawing over to intellectually stimulating. Running parallel to this education was another form of instruction but more on a spiritual level. I had discovered meditation. The universe then also opened her arms and out fell an abundance of pure literary genius. Deepak Chopra, Paulho Coehlo, Caroline Myss, Sonia Choquette, Mike Dooley, Doreen Virtue, Michael A Singer and Michael Neill and I soaked them all up like a sponge dried out in the hot sun. Serendipitous encounters with those engaged in the use of tarot, dream interpretation and psychic readings began to occur furthering my alternate education. What a wonderous time to be alive it was exposed to the world and its marvels. Somehow, I knew I was as a child standing at the doors of Toys R Us, God at my back urging me to: “Go play my child!”.
This is where I believe my expectations were set because after graduating, I began working as a Geotechnical Engineer and my favourite author was now Robert Kiyosaki. I was on the fast track, doing exactly as the Universe had instructed and everything began to fall into place. I believe the reason they call it beginners’ luck is because as a beginner the luck flows your way, getting you hooked. The second time around it does not feel nearly as magical. I feel like I must work harder for this one.
Round Two - transitioning from Geotechnical Engineer to Transformation Consultant using Kinesiology as my superpower. There has been no unexpected benefactor and seemingly no serendipitous encounters, instead feeling much lonelier. Less fireworks maybe, but far more internal shifts feeling like nothing has changed but in fact everything has.
Is it my expectations, my thinking around the subject matter or is it simply my lack of recognising the magic that has surrounded me at this time? The only question that remains then, is how can I be more present in my life today?
- Accepting who I have become.
- Letting go of who I was.
- Acknowledging that I am where I am meant to be.