Updated: Sep 20, 2020

In writing this piece I am reminded of the scene from Dead Poets Society where Robin Williams’ character stands on his desk and asks his students: “Why do I stand up here?”

“I stand upon my desk to remind myself that we must constantly look at things in a different way.”

This can be said of our creativity as well. I have never thought of myself as creative having been denied the opportunity to enrol for the art class at school by the art teacher at the time for ‘not being creative enough’. How could she even have known? Ironically getting excluded from this class happened at the same time I produced my first self-published novel and my first encounter with stark criticism of my work at the tender age of around fifteen when my English teacher ripped apart my comprehension. Looking back, I wonder to myself if this is where my limiting belief around creativity had its roots? Why was I denied access to the arts, was it because at the time I lacked the self confidence in my abilities and so exuded this outward energetically? How was I even to know about these energetic things when my brain had not fully developed yet?

Or was it perhaps that I was denied entry so that I could in fact go out and live a tortured life and then become known for my eccentric nature, the starving artist believing that fame and fortune would only come my way once I was dead? Such was my connection to the drama. The only problem with that was that the drama remained in my life and none of it actually made it to the page.

Perhaps if I think of another way to look at it. Without having taken all the twists and turns in my life, I would not have a life to write about. I would never have developed the compassion I may require for my characters or know how adequately to describe a villain had I not spent so much time with real life ones.

Now when I take Willow for a walk, I take along and old Samsung phone my husband no longer uses, and I take photos of what I believe will be interesting conversation starters. So, I guess you could say I am seeing life through the eyes of a lens. Pun intended.

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